Anna Mae D. Dela Cruz
Individual Paper 1
Two semesters ago I read a chapter in my Priman book. It turned out not to be included among those assigned by my professor, but I in no time felt lucky to have read it anyway. It was a chapter on entrepreneurship, and what struck me about it was that of all the chapters in that book, indeed of all the chapters I've read throughout my MBA, it was the one that resonated with me the most. Entrepreneurial activities and qualities seemed like things I wanted to aspire to and felt I could identify with.
I immediately took the personality tests included in the reference. I recently took a Forbes self-assessment online as well. The results are consistent; I don't score perfectly, but each test concluded that I am a good fit for this kind of career. But exactly what kind of person would fit this role?
Many experts and studies have investigated the qualities of entrepreneurs—what they are like, whether they are born or made, etc. Each reference suggests a slightly different set of characteristics, but all agree that entrepreneurs in general have a different outlook in life and exhibit this through actions that are quite distinctive from those of traditional managers. For the sake of concision, I will reflect on my own qualities following the outline offered by my Priman textbook, which offers a short but succinct list. The text states: "Some 40 traits are identified as being associated with entrepreneurship, but 6 have special importance." Below I will first paraphrase how the text explains each of the six, then go on to discuss whether I might have them.
Internal locus of control
This refers to the belief that one's future is within one's control and that external forces have little influence. Entrepreneurs are convinced they can make the difference between success and failure. They not only have the vision, but must be able to plan to achieve that vision and believe it will happen. Essentially, an entrepreneur believes his fate is in his own hands.
I generally hold an empowered attitude. I believe one is never completely at the mercy of one's bosses, background, or times. Though these shape the challenges and opportunities we encounter, they do not determine the outcomes—we do. And though it is also true that life is replete with personal challenges and curve balls, I do not blame failures on circumstance; I blame them on my inability to adapt. This is generally how I process the events in my life, and according to these references that is an invaluable quality to have in an entrepreneur.
The thing about an internal locus of control, however, is that it must be partnered with a great deal of strength and perseverance. Believing that I am accountable for my own fate can be an incredibly discouraging, even destructive quality if its only outcome is that I blame myself for everything. That sense of accountability must come with the ability to move on from mistakes and failures and keep going—and that, to me, is the harder part. It is often difficult for me to forgive myself. In my mind, I know what I have to do and why, but how I feel is another matter altogether and being able to deal with that is crucial to moving forward.
High energy level
Entrepreneurs have high levels of passion, which help them overcome inevitable obstacles and traumas—an essential trait where risk and failures are inevitable. They have an unwavering belief in a dream, intense focus, and unconventional risk-taking.
Many people mistake my work ethic for passion. They often think I must be devoted to and happy in my field because I put so much energy into it, when that is often not at all the case. That is simply how I work, whether I am passionate about something or not.
My point is, I have plenty of energy, but to define energy as coming from passion alone is faulty and misleading. Sure passion is important and it can make all the difference. But I think it is also rather overrated; commitment, to me, is the superior quality. Passion can die out, but commitment will keep one going throughout setbacks and adversity. I have the energy and a strong sense of commitment in the short-term in the sense that if I am in something, I am in it. However I'd say I lack long-term commitment. In fact I am rather commitment-phobic in that it is difficult for me to find a field or an organization I'd want to be "stuck with". I like being free to move around and move on, not for want of willingness to "settle down," but because I find it very hard to find something I'd want to devote myself completely to. At the same time lately I find myself in a point in my career where I'd like to let go of all my distractions and previous activities and just build something of my own and stay with it.
Need to achieve
Entrepreneurs are motivated to excel and pick situations in which success is likely. They like to set their own goals, which are moderately difficult.
My goals and direction tend to change often, but a habit of mine is to set milestones for every direction I am currently heading towards—milestones that push me to advance at a relatively brisk pace. I compete with myself constantly, and have an intense need to feel like I'm getting somewhere and getting there fast. At work, it comes in the form of racking up experience—ex. I need to have gained so-and-so projects and clientele in a year's time. It applies even to my leisure hours: The last time I went to Boracay I told myself that by my fourth day there I should be able to swim from Station 1 all the way to Station 3 and back. One way to put it is that I don't know how to relax.
I was amused by how precisely the textbook described this quality. It said that not only do entrepreneurs like to set their own goals, these goals are also "moderately difficult." Hence a closely related quality is the need to be challenged. Something only feels like an achievement if it was difficult in the first place. My bosses know I can be a high-maintenance employee that way; they have to give me progressively harder tasks because I either keep advancing or I lose interest and leave. I must be completely stumped by the problems I have to solve, to not know what to do even just for a while. Only then will I be excited enough to try and solve something, or else I go through the motions and feel like I achieved nothing in the end.
The book also said "[Entrepreneurs] pick situations in which success is likely." I consciously set myself up for success. I pick battles that are tough, but battles I know I can win. That may sound negative in the sense that I might be avoiding failure, but that is a misinterpretation. I like things to be difficult, but moderately so. Being challenged is different from putting myself completely out of my league.
Self-Confidence
Entrepreneurs act decisively. They are confident about their ability to master the day-to-day tasks of their business. They feel sure about their ability to win customers, handle technical details, and keep the business moving. They are confident they can deal with anything in the future, with complex and unanticipated problems.
I am confident I have this characteristic in good measure. For someone who can't figure out what she wants in life, this is simply necessary for survival. I often enter new fields and tackle new problems with little background or experience. I have a fairly strong basic education, but I guess more than anything else, that confidences comes from having the ability to learn and learn fast.
Decisiveness, however, is partly about knowing you can do things and partly about knowing what you want to do in the first place. I don't have a problem with the first part, it's the second that derails me each time. In gist I have potential but no direction.
Awareness of passing time
Entrepreneurs have a sense of urgency; they are impatient. They want things moving immediately and seldom procrastinate. They seize the moment.
I don't like to waste time. Once I've made a decision, I go—whether it's medical school (which I quit early on and never look back on), companies (and all the resignation letters I've written), or relationships. I constantly feel like I am racing against time, that I should have been able to achieve everything ten years before I did. Others say I'm accomplished for my age. As far as I'm concerned, I'm already a disappointment and still trying to make up for lost time. I don't know if this kind of self-imposed pressure is the same as the sense of urgency the text is referring to. I also sometimes wonder if this speaks of a sense of insecurity or is simply the result of being socialized to value ambition. I think not, however, especially lately as I've come to realize that I am not actually ambitious and I am fine with that. I think a more accurate term for why I am like this would perhaps be boredom.
Tolerance for ambiguity
Entrepreneurs are untroubled by disorder and uncertainty
Looking at my career so far, no one can accuse me of being afraid of uncertainty. My choices reflect a penchant for crossing uncharted and stormy territory—whether it's joining a reform movement in government, trying to pave the way for non-MDs in public health, giving up a clear-cut future in medicine, etc. In fact, jobs and projects must often bear some degree of ambiguity to elicit my interest. Sometimes I do get tired, and increasingly so this recent year. But I guess the point is, it is not for want of stability.
Clearly there are a lot of caveats to these characteristics. It is not simply a matter of having certain qualities, but of having the complementary qualities as well and being able to balance everything.
Here's another caveat: I rate pretty well on these 6 attributes. And I guess that is reassuring, except I also have serious weaknesses that I bet fall within the "other 40" qualities of entrepreneurs. In particular, these are a lack of creativity, passion, and people skills.
I am not so good at thinking out-of-the-box. My ideas are often just a rehash of things that already exist. To compensate, I just trying to make those boxes bigger by exploring a variety of industries, traveling, and questioning the status quo, which help me gain perspective on local practices, see how others do things, and think about greater possibilities. Integration happens to be one of my mental strengths, which helps me put things together and apply things from one field to another. However as a whole I still have a hard time coming up with truly radical and original ideas. I am no Steve Jobs.
As for passion, I just rarely feel that way about something. And what bothers me is that when I do think about the things I feel strongly about, they often come into conflict with what I feel I should be doing instead. But that is another story.
Poor people skills is a serious waterloo. I am a perfectionist hence often anal retentive. I also have a strong tendency to be anti-social; socializing requires quite a good deal of effort from me and I often struggle with trying to love people so that this genuinely comes across. I know that must sound awful, but at heart I am a quiet person with not a lot of fondness for human nature, and people can feel that.
So what does it mean if I am strong on some qualities and weak at others? Does that mean I cannot be an entrepreneur? Must I be a perfect fit for it in order to be one?
Reflecting on that, I suddenly realize why an internal locus of control was the number one quality. My plain and simple answer to that is: If I want to, I can. 4
